Depression

I spent this weekend knitting. I know that I have a million things which need to be done around here, but I did none of them. I just sat, listened to a book on tape, watched the same movie as the book and knitted. I don't understand why I do this. I just get very depressed and want to not even move. I also spent a lot of time sleeping. If I had my choice that is what I would do all the time. Unfortunately, my body won't let me sleep that much, although I sure can sleep a lot. So, I knit. It is the only thing other than sleeping that makes it all better. Right now I am sitting here trying to think of a reason to stay home so I can knit. I won't though, I will go to work and hate every minute of it. When I get like this I don't care about anything and the only reason I knit is because I can't sleep.

So, what have I been knitting. A baby blanket for Tawana's soon to be grand daughter. A baby poncho with hood for the same baby. I had that one almost done and had to rip back to a couple of inches from the beginning because of a mistake. I did finish a wool baby hat which will be sent to Afghanistan to a children's hospital there. I am also working on a shawl for the elders and a dishcloth baby blanket for the rez.

I found some very large (3 gals) Zip Lock bags this weekend and have been using them to put projects in that I will be working on later. I got this idea from the Yarn Harlot http://www.yarnharlot.ca who says she does this all the time. I didn't know they made them this big. She says they even make them big enough to put an 8 year old in but I wouldn't recommend it. The 3 gal size is big enough to hold all the yarn, needles and pattern and whatever else might be needed for that project. For instance I put all of the wool into a bag because it will all make up into hats and a baby blanket to be sent to Afghanistan instead of the acrylic that I use for the rez. I was thinking that when I use up all of the yarn I have (in about 40 years LOL) I will only use wool for the rez. They know how to handle it and most of them have to do their laundry by hand anyway. But that is in the future and I need to get all of this used up before that happens.

I was supposed to go to breakfast at IHop with the people from PITC. This was our last time to be together and the class is all done so we were going to meet there to have a little get together and the agency was paying for breakfast. I decided not to go. Why? Well, I have not heard from any of them since I transfered from up there. Not even Terri, she never even called me to say if the baby has been born yet. So, why should I go? I am tired of being used by people, from now on I will help IF I can and if I either can't or don't feel like it I won't. I have a baby blanket and a blanket for her older grandson sitting here and they will both go out in the next box to the rez.

Well, now that I have depressed you I will go get ready for work and maybe get a little knitting done before I leave. Here's a little information about me which will let you know how weird I am. I will leave here an hour or more before I have to be to work so I can sit in the car, listen to a book on tape and knit before I have to go in. Now, is that strange or what? I wish I could find a job where all I have to do is knit. Unfortunately, I am not really good enough to do it professionally, just good enough for me. But, then again I guess that is all that counts.

Have a great day and be nice to each other.